the brew*crew adventure

I haven't participated in this meme before, Blogger Friend School, which provides a weekly "blogging homework" theme. As I was browsing through some of the amazing blogs listed over at the HSB Awards, I clicked onto this week's theme for the BFS, and was totally inspired to join in, since it goes hand in hand with thoughts and observations I've been having here in the last couple weeks anyways. Technically, I believe that the "assignment" is supposed to be posted on Tuesday?, but in my natural way, I'm posting mine a day two days late!

 

The passion to sing, the passion to draw, the passion to build, the passion to ride, the passion for reading, the passion for nature… the list is endless. Some children exhibit their passion from day one, others need an experience to spark that passion.

Assignment: Share a field trip/lifestyle learning experience where you really felt you were bringing good things to life for your children, where something came alive for them, or ignited a passion.

This is something I've been thinking about a lot lately... the facilitating of that passion to learn, to build and to creatively express ones self; that desire to grow and to become something great that's within us all, my own children specifically, manifesting itself in so many various talents. As a parent and my children's primary instructor, it's important to me that I culture their God-given abilities and desires, bringing these good things to life, if you will... while at the same time realizing that I truly am not taking the lead... in that it's not all up to me to conjure these up in my kids. Rather, I'm watching, listening, and waiting on the Holy Spirit to show me their intrinsic giftings, and praying for His guidance as I plan our studies and their activities.

As I'm doing my best to daily immerse our kids in an engaging learning environment and introducing them to a variety of inspiring subjects, I am delighted to be discovering their passions with them, and comforted in the remembrance that these precious soul stirrings and that ultimate quickening of their spirits towards Him are all individual workings of His Spirit within them, as we're learning to walk out His Word in our lives together, and therefore not solely dependent upon me, nor anyone else. I need but tune in to them, and especially their Creator, while keeping my eyes wide open to the opportunities abounding in each moment as we journey together each day, lest I miss those small sparks that would ultimately kindle their passions and thereby could someday even dictate their very livelihoods.

I have found that with our oldest daughter, 9yo T, who is my "go-getter", this is an easier thing to recognize; her passions. She talks about it, and initiates doing stuff working towards that end on her own. When she's inspired, the results are much more extravagant and obvious than when our 12 yo son, N is impassioned. He tends to discover passions (like writing, dance, reading a certain book, horse riding) after I've suggested he try something out. Lately I have been fascinated over the inter-connectedness of their blossoming personalities with the opportunities they've been offered thusfar in their young lives. I'm left to wonder over how beautifully it has all worked together... and question which came first, a specific passion or was an experience the catalyst of curiosity turned to desire? I've been musing over what the ramifications of these truths could be, not only in my kids' lives, but in my own as well.

And we know that for those who love God, that is, for those who are called according to his purpose, all things are working together for good.

~ Romans 8.28

It's certainly a mystery profound how the Sovereign Lord choreographs our very lives, nurturing those seeds of talent He placed within us, even as He knit us in the womb, while simultaneously allowing the free-will of our individuality. It's caused me to consider the weighty responsibility Chris and I have as parents to introduce our children- His children- to a wide array of possibilities, directing them toward His truths, and presenting them with an assortment of rich ideas for their minds and hearts to grow upon. Gradually, I am learning to recognize when the "education" is doing its work within them, and to therefore not snuff out the tiny flames which seem yet so insignificant by my own lofty unrealistic adult-perspective qualifying standards, set mostly by pre-conceived ideas of how learning "should look"... Meaningful learning does not necessarily mean a finished *project*. I'm learning to look with my child-eyes again.

For instance, the other day when T showed me the language she's creating for the characters in one of her stories, my first teacherly-Mom thoughts were along the lines of, "well, that's not a real language... why should she be wasting her time and all of that good language interest and energies with this when we could be working on our Latin or Hebrew?" Thankfully, in the next instant, I realized that I was witnessing a beautifully genuine representation of this child's love for language and passion for writing. And so the thoughts I expressed to her were those of encouragement and "why not?, how clever!" and musings over the inceptions of various languages.

But that was not the only challenge along these lines that either one of my kids have thrown at my feeble mind in the last couple of weeks. Last month N, who's been taking guitar lessons for just over a year now (that was his own inspired idea, which he faltered in when it came to the monotany of daily practice), announced to me that he'd like to come up with his own song to play at our co-op's end of the year student presentations ceremony... I immediately had to shush my overly-conservative, doubtful-of-his-being-ready-to-do-that thoughts right up. After months of laboring resistantly through daily practicings on his guitar, he's made it over some kind of mental hump, and now usually plays daily (without my having to tell him to!), and tells me he absolutely loves it. He was also greatly inspired by the movie August Rush. As we're driving home from his lessons, he often tells me excitedly of what he's learning, and how encouraging his guitar teacher is. Just last week his instructor told him that he could play his own songs without having any music written out(?!), and could even learn to play chords he hasn't yet formally learned, just by intently listening to a piece of music and then copying what he hears. Imagine that... I am so thankful for the many wonderfully inspiring people that have been God's vessels of instruction for our kids  (and myself) over the years, what evidence of HIS faithful provision! On so very many levels, this whole parenting/homeschooling business has been such a growing experience for my own faith levels.

And I know that I've mentioned here before of how my daring daughter gets these crazy inspired ideas to do things that are much bigger than any goals I'd ever set for her. I've seen how God has been faithful to send others into our lives to facilitate dreaming and passions that I could not... but I'm apparently a slow learner. Usually my first (natural) impulse is to caution her and help her to pare her visions down a bit, set her sights more realistically... but her fervor and insistence that she can and has already counted the cost of a conceived endeavour has once again inspired me, and as I've let go of the reigns I had moments before fearfully rationally tightened my grip on, I've been further delighted to see how God has sent others to come along side of me/us to see that her fans are flamed and help set her on the path to accomplishing these fantastic goals that I couldn't have orchestrated or provided for on my own, let alone have even decided upon.

Once again, this week it seems that another request, prayerfully offered up by a girl with bigger faith shoes than I can fill has been fulfilled by a generous Father.

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows...     

~ James 1.17

T has praise in her heart. She loves to put on worship music and dance before the Lord enthusiastically. It's something that I've enjoyed doing with my kids since they were babies in my arms, twirling together with hands lifted high. T told me on Monday that she'd like to choreograph her own dance to a Third Day song and perform it at the aforementioned homeschool co-op student presentation ceremony. I gulped down my doubts, astonished at her brevity, again. She proceeded to explain her plans to me, and I just nodded along as I listened, knowing better than to discourage her resolve. "I'm going to ask Mrs. Jamie (her dance instructor- that's another testimony we have of His great provision for us- scholarships for dance lessons) to help me with my moves and figuring it all out." "That's a good idea." "Okay then, you'll have to wait for me a little bit longer after class so that I can talk to her about it." I agreed. And after her dance class ended on Tuesday, I watched as she gingerly approached her teacher, holding her passion close, encased in a dream that she proceeded to share with a trusted confidante. To my great surprise and delight, Jamie agreed to help her and meet with her a half hour before her class, every week- for free! I went back and checked with her myself after T told me, just to make sure it was really alright! Is that crazy-generous, and just like God, or what?! Needless to say, T is so excited about it that she's on fire now, and has asked a dancing friend that we carpool with to join her in the dance! She's been busily drawing and dancing up her choreography plans. Here's what she's got so far:

I tried getting some pictures of her dancing, but she wouldn't cooperate.

She did, however, allow me to take some pictures of her practicing on her violin. This - her opportunity to play the violin this year- is another story of her aspirations met by the willing Hand of Providence.

T has wanted to take violin lessons for years. I believe that the desire was probably first sparked sometime in her toddlerhood, when we spent a great deal of time with friends, whose then highschool daughter played the violin beautifully. She would watch and listen to her play intently every chance that she got. She began asking for lessons a few years ago, but we couldn't afford private violin lessons, and neither Chris nor I can even read music (something which both of our children are now learning to do quite well -without us!).  As I do, I told her that I would join in her praying that if it be His will, that He would provide an avenue for this opportunity for her. Then last year, we were blessed with the means to pay for N to have the private guitar lessons I mentioned above, and she so wanted the same. She confided to me of how she was struggling with jealousy and I reminded her that he too had been waiting for years for music lessons. Her time would come... and to be patient. Meanwhile, she decided to master her recorder and used the book that it came with to teach herself to read music and play quite a few folk songs. She joined a class offered at our co-op for the recorder, and took heart in my reminder not to despise small beginnings.

Then, to our delighted amazement, a wonderful lady decided to teach a strings class at our homeschool co-op this year, specifically violin and cello. T was beside herself with excitement over this opportunity to finally learn to play her instrument of choice - the violin. Now... if only we had a violin. I prayerfully sought the Lord, trusting Him to provide this too, knowing that with Him in it, it would all come together. Chris and I knew that it would have to happen cheaply to be feasible for us. Then towards the end of last school year, it came up at our Bible study with some friends that T was so glad to be looking forward to taking a violin class at our co-op, and since this friend had played for years, we asked her for suggestions concerning our finding a used violin for T. To our thrilled astonishment, she offered to loan T her own beautiful violin for as long as she needed it.

Time and again I have been blessed to see God's orchestration of timely provision for our children's passions, in both their inceptions and continuity. As their Mother and primary instructor, I find rest in knowing that it is not up to me to bring all these good things to life in their worlds,

      ‘ Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,’
Says the LORD of hosts.

~ Zechariah 4.6

but rather I am just an open conduit of His loving kindness and purposes for each of them, His unique creations.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Memory Verse: Philippians 4:8

In conclusion, brothers, focus your thoughts on what is true, noble, righteous, pure, lovable or admirable, on some virtue or on something praiseworthy.

My blog here was actually nominated in the HSB Awards for "Best Unschooling or Eclectic Homeschooling Blog 2008"! so if you feel so inclined, I'd really appreciate your vote! ...though I hardly feel worthy to even be listed among so many wonderful homeschool blogs! There are some really GREAT homeschooling blogs listed there in ALL of the categories so be sure and check them out! You WILL be inspired and encouraged, I know that I certainly have been subscribing to some new favorites! Be sure and check them all out, and then VOTE for your favorites!

Life with a little one is busy... ALL. the time. I'd forgotten just how busy one baby can keep a Momma, and then, throw in a seventh grader and a fourth grader, with so many of their activities and a large part of their education hinging on my daily accessibility... not to even mention everyday stuff like housework, cooking healthful meals, running errands, etcetera... and then wifedom too! ...and there you have 'em... my reasons -in a nut shell- for neglecting this here blog of mine lately. I mean, the baby girl turned ONE year old back in August, and I have yet to get a picture of her sweetness in cake up here on my blog! Pitiful... *smiles*

There's also the general brain-writer's-block and tendency towards passivity and wanting to just veg-out, read or play when I do sit down at mr.mac here, or baby S's thinking that this computer/desk chair is the nursing chair, and therefore pulling on my arm until I pick her up and nurse her (hungry or not, she likes to just lay in my lap and comfort nurse... endlessly it seems! aaack!) every time I sit down in it for longer than 5 minutes, which makes it rather hard to type, her being about 30#'s and 32" long now. But OH! how my head is swimming with ideas, my heart brimming with meditations, ponderings and everyday updates that my fingers are ready to write out, when the time is right... like now- today I'm making time, I've sent the kids outside to play in this beautiful sunny Fall weather.

I have been encouraged though in seeing that I do have faithful friends, family and anonymous readers, albeit a few, who do still continue to patiently wait for my humble musings, checking back here and actually reading when I do get around to posting, even subscribing. Thank you! You are what makes this creative outlet so much fun and worth every bit of effort. I have finally figured out how to use an RSS reader, and it's great! It really does streamline your online reading and save time. I'm using Google reader, and encourage you to check it out if you don't already have a reader of choice. Then you can subscribe to my blog here, or most any other online site you'd like to keep up with, and will automatically be able to see/read when any one you've subscribed to has updated, all from one page. It's niiice.

I'm Feelin' the Love Here...

I'd like to thank Renae, of Life Nurturing Education, who hearted my blog a couple of weeks ago, despite its recent dormancy. Ha! Thanks for the encouragement friend, I heart yours too!! I always find inspiration over at Renae's blog, and I'd like to heart a few of my favorites here as well. Much love to all of my bloggy friends~ and I'd like to heart "7 from heaven" (in keeping with Renae's cornball standard) here:

 7 from heaven that I just love...

1. Leslie (aka. Tim's Mom) of Bona Vita Rusticanda Est, which she writes with her son, Tim. I had the wonderful pleasure of finally meeting this AO/CM celebrity a few weeks back at a Mom's night out dinner for the local Charlotte Mason group here. We've been online friends for years, and wanting to get together in real life (since we only live about 40 mins. from eachother) for a long time, and finally got around to it! I had so much fun, and I'm already looking forward to our next get-together! She's just as I'd imagined, only a little shorter...
2. Jenny of Under His Wings, a kindred spirit blogging sister of mine for years, whom I could talk to forever (knitter of beautiful baby rainbow blankets) and do hope that I can meet one day in real life as well, on this side of the Jordan.
3. Christine of The Blue Bird Sings, a local dear friend of mine that I've become fast friends with so easily. I just met her at co-op last year and we hit it off right away (as did our daughters as well). She actually blames me for giving her the blogging bug, but since she gave me the knitting bug, I'd say we're even! Hah!
4. Nina of Raising Butterflies, who always, ALWAYS makes me laugh, or at least crack a big 'ol smile when I read her thoughtfully quirky posts. She's such a natural, great writer and also another local homeschooler I've met IRL. It was a bit surreal when she walked up to me at an organized field-trip to the local Hands-On-Museum and said she *knew* me from my blog, introducing herself as a reader. Weird, but totally cool too!
5. Birdie of Wings and Prayers whose blog and family I just love, and to whom I still owe some whole-grain recipe postages... getting to that, I promise, recipe posts forthcoming to all who care to read!
6. Dana of Principled Discovery, and Simple Pleasures, is another blogging buddy whose blogs I just Love and have learned a lot from over the years! (Yes, I realize that Renae already hearted Dana, but hey, one cannot get too much of Dana... and what can I say, she's a fave of mine too. I'm thinking she won't mind being hearted again though! Right?)
7. Heather of Sprittibee, who I'd bumped into here in blogosphere years ago, back when we both first started blogging, right about the same time. I've always found such inspiration over at her place, and it's also been fun to learn this year of how similar our political views are. Sprittibee had also tagged me way back in August with the "6 Quirky Things Meme", so now, without further adieu, I shall finally get on to completing this meme!

RULES of the '6 Quirky Things' meme:

* Link to the person who tagged you.
* Mention the rules in your blog.
* Tell about six unspectacular quirks of yours.
* Tag a new set of six following bloggers by linking to them.

Okay, so here's my six things (which I've asked N and T to think of for me, since they're now sitting here at the table next to me, with much more creative energies than I, as prior mentioned brain-block has kicked in... and I'm finding it hard to think of things about me, being used to me and all):

1. I'm "funky and wear blue polka-dot pants." (love those spunky knee-shorts, got 'em for $3 from a Goody's sale last summer, they make me *feel* happy to wear them... unfortunately they're too big now- though losing weight is good- but, still... I'll miss them.)
2. I "let my husband hang three deer-heads in the house!" (oh, he's got it good... he doesn't even realize how tolerant and sweet I am...)
3. I "wear a purse the size of a bag with potatoes in it!" (that would be my fab new knit "Sak" purse from my heaven-sent MIL)
4. I "cook the best food in the world" (okay, someone gets dinner tonight)
5. I "wear a pony-tail on most days" (*sighs*...yeah, wondering if I should get a cut?)
6. I'm "a good organizer"(Oh, wow, I'm glad they think so! LOL)

So, there you have it folks! I'm tagging the same ladies as I did above (minus Sprit because she tagged me first and has already done this meme!) because I now have a squirmy-wormy girl in my arms and need to sign off! *Interesting, fun sidenote: Just realizing that three of my seven friends here are expecting another baby of their own soon... Isn't that wonderful? Congratulations (again)!*

1. Bona Vita Rusticanda Est
2. Under His Wings
3. The Blue Bird Sings
4. Raising Butterflies
5. Wings and Prayers
6. Principled Discovery

Amy of Dandelion Seeds is inviting anyone who would like to commit to praying for the Drews family to please email her to sign up for a specific time, or just let her know that you're praying, and she'll then let the Drews know that so many are lifting them up. You may go to her post here to read more about it and to see what times are left. Her goal is to have every hour of a 24 hour day covered by Sept. 25, which will mark a month since they lost their precious baby boy, Christian Edward Drews.

I'm asking anyone interested in lifting Marsha and their family in prayer every day at a promised time until the 25th (marking one month since "Dozer" went to be with Jesus) to email me (amy@dandelionseeds.com) with the time you'll be praying (please include your blog link if you have one as well, and put COVERING THE DREWS FAMILY in the subject line so it will be easier for me to sort everyone's requests with my other emails.  Please email me so I can compile all of the addresses for Marsha to receive as well, as I know she will want them).

The evening before yesterday I was so sad to hear of the news that a precious homeschool family had lost their three year old little boy in a tragic accident. And so I went to bed praying for this mother, unable to fathom how her heart must be breaking... yet compelled to imagine what it must feel like, what her reality was even then- heart-wrenching and mind-numbing. The next morning I was stunned to learn that the mother I'd been praying for was none other than Marsha Drew, a fellow blogging friend that I used to keep up and share with very regularly. She has been on my mind and in my prayers continually these last few days, and how I've wanted to do something, to somehow just reach out and touch her across the miles, offer my sincerest love and support.

You may go and read a tribute to little Christian "Dozer", A Sweet Little Man of God! here, at Heart Of The Matter.

In heaven with our Lord...

You alone are the LORD. You made the heavens, even the highest heavens, and all their starry host, the earth and all that is on it, the seas and all that is in them. You give life to everything, and the multitudes of heaven worship you. ~ Nememiah 9:6

Emily of The Learning Never Stops has had a blessedly inspired idea, one which will allow me (and you) to join with Marsha in the most meaningful and healing way, at the feet of our Lord, in worship. See- Emily's bought an iPod, which she's filling with songs for Marsha. I'm thankful to share with her in this opportunity for us to bless Marsha, and thereby the rest of her family as well. I will continue in praying for Marsha, grieving for her loss... and I hope that you will as well. Chris and I are both so grieved for the Drew family. I hope that these songs we're all sending to her will somehow help her to lift her whole heart, aches, questions, et al to HIM in total surrender, as she listens and finds her heart's renewal through worship. What an honor it is to bless her in this way.

If you feel so led, won't you go over to Emily's and leave her your own prayerfully selected suggestions for a song or two to go on Marsha's iPod.

T suggested "In Christ Alone" as sung by the Newsboys, so that's her offering. It's perfect. I'd just read this morning's devotional from Elisabeth Elliot, and I couldn't help but to think of Marsha and her family, and their recent loss of little Dozer:

Paul was a man who suffered the loss of everything, according to his own claim. Yet any loss he counted pure gain. The key to this transforming of earthly losses into heavenly gains is love. What do we love? If our hearts are set on people and possessions and position, the loss of those will indeed be irreparable. To the man or woman whose heart is set on Christ no loss on earth can be irreparable.

It may shock us for the moment. We may feel hurt, outraged, desolate, helpless. That is our humanity. But the Lord can show us the "long view," the incalculable gain in spiritual and eternal terms, if we love Him above all. Everything that belongs to us belongs also to Him. Everything that belongs to Him belongs also to us. What, then, can we finally lose? If we lose not Christ Himself, we have finally lost nothing, for He is our treasure and He has our hearts.

One of my all-time favorite worship albums is Rita Springer's "Created to Worship", but if I had to pick one song two songs of hers, for Marsha right now, they'd be "It's Gonna Be Worth It All" and  "Freedom Reigns".

"Never Alone" by Barlow Girl also speaks so powerfully of faith:

I waited for you today
But You didn't show
No.No.No.
I needed You today
So where did you go?
You told me to call
you said You'd be there
And though I haven't seen You
Are You still there?

Chorus
I cried out with no reply and
I can't feel You by my side
So I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here and I'm never alone.

And though I can not see You
and I can't explain why.
Such a deep, deep reassurance
You've placed in my life oh
We cannot separate
'Cause You're part of me
and though You're invisible
I'll trust the unseen

Chorus
I cried out with no reply
And I can't feel You by my side
So I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here and I'm never alone

We cannot separate
You're part of me
and though You're invisible
I'll trust the unseen

Chorus

...and a few from another one of my fave worship bands, WaterDeep, from their Worship Circle albums: "Big Enough to Hold Me":

...I know You, You, You are big enough to hold me
I know You Lord, yeah You
Will carry me through
How great, how high
How deep, how wide
Is Your love
The space in my mind is too small for You
The space in my heart is too small for You too
And all of things of the earth that i know
Are too small for all of the greatness You've shown
But in all of this i'm still facing my needs
And i'm scared of how big they feel to me
Nothing can separate from the love of Christ
All my doubts, He sees past and things to come

along with "I Will Not Forget You~ Ps.50" (which Third Day also did, but Waterdeep wrote it and I personally like WD's version better), "Come Fall On Us" and "Since I am So Sick":

Since I am so sick
Since I am in need
Since I have no healing within me
Oh, my God, be mindful of me
You are my help and my Redeemer
Oh, my God, be mindful of me
You are my help and my Redeemer
Unto You, oh Lord
I lift up my soul
In Your loving-kindness I believe
Surely those who wait on You
Will never be ashamed
All of those who call on You
Will know the faithfulness of Your name

Also "Why" by Michael Card:

Why did it have to be a friend who chose to betray the Lord?
and why did he use a kiss to show them, that's not what a kiss is for?
Only a friend can betray a friend, a stranger has nothing to gain.
and only a friend comes close enough to ever cause so much pain. Why did it have to be a thorny crown place upon his head?
It should have been a royal one, made of jewels and gold instead.
It had to be a crown of thorns, because in this world that we live,
all that would seek to love a thorn is all the world has to give.

Why did it have to be a heavy cross he was made to bear?
and why did they nail His feet and hands; His love would have held him there.
It was a cross for on a cross, a thief was supposed to pay.
and Jesus had come into the world to steal every heart away.

Yes, Jesus had come into the world to steal every heart away.

and "The Poem of Your Life", also by Michael Card.
"Eternal Father Strong to Save", as sung by Eden's Bridge.

And perhaps "The River" by Cece Winans, which is all about entrusting our children to the purposes of Adonai, especially when it means letting them go, and not understanding our circumstances. Marsha and David are having to commit their hopes and dreams for little Dozer into the Lord's keeping in a way that I just can't imagine, entrusting his future to his Maker... fully letting go (as Jochobed did when she placed Moses in that river so long ago). Though unknown, and yet veiled to us here on this side of eternity, Christian's purpose is indeed great in our Lord's awesomely eternal plan. How wonderful to know that he is in Heaven- in the very presence of our Lord, even now! What a blessed assurance, Joy in the midst of Sorrow, Peace in the midst of Suffering. Knowledge of this I know, the truth of which I pray would bring comfort to this family- daily.

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It's 5:20 AM!, and I've been awake for well over an hour now. I laid in bed for almost 40 minutes, trying to go back to sleep, but to no avail. My mind was whirling with thoughts, composing them, unwinding words from skeins of memory and perception, hoping that I would even be able to find them to explore and ravel later, these prose lacking cohesive meaning. I deliberated over whether or not to risk waking baby S, whether to get up and write them out, lest they disappear with my consciousness if I sleep- elusive and so easily lost they are, like grasping at wind, or trying to hold onto light. I was wishing that I had one of those writer's pens with a light, but wondering would that even work, without waking S and Chris, both obliviously snoozing on either side of me... and so, as the thoughts piled and sleeping I was not, I decided to climb out of bed at this totally crazy hour and write... since the words were still piling and I was too entangled to rest.

Last night, as I was putting baby S to sleep, I remembered that I had a bag on the table where I'd left it this afternoon, with a roll of deep, forest green wool yarn in it, and smooth, wooden needles looped with the beginning rows of a scarf that I'm knitting. In the same instant I realized that I wanted to knit (just really felt like doing it- right then, curious.), but I knew that it was late, and baby S probably wasn't going to let me get up and leave from nursing her to do anything- I tried anyways. Nope, didn't work. Heh. So, I laid there, falling asleep, and wishing that I could get up and knit, because I can.

That's right, I can! My dear friend Christine, accomplished knitter and wonderful teacher that she is, showed me (again, only it was my daughter T who showed me how the first time- earlier this year) how to cast-on, and helped me to figure out what I was doing wrong before, that had been bringing me so much frustration and eventually caused me to give up entirely for the greater part of last year (thus the having forgotten even how to cast-on and having to start over from the beginning part). It would be too technical and hard (for me) to try and explain what exactly I was doing wrong, but suffice it to say, that T will also benefit from my lesson yesterday, as she was having the same problem with her own knitting, which I'd inadvertently picked up. But now, finally, I've got it, and knitting is fun!

Somehow, as I lay there in bed last night, somewhere between sleep and wakefulness, it occurred to me that knitting is a bit like writing... but I don't know if I shall be able to do the epiphany justice with my written words here, as it was a visual realization.  Case in point though.

I felt saw how the words I was formulating into strands of meaningful thoughts were like yarn I was pulling from a ball of potential, twisted threads of yet disorganized, shapeless promise, rich in texture, and brilliant in their hue. Every word that I could stitch with precision was one more link in a chain of conceptualization that would eventually be a complete thought piece. If I could only stitch one to the next, and to the next, and to the next... pulling and pushing them from the skein of memories, meanings, questions wound by daily living and nestled restlessly, yet unformed, waiting within my subconsciousness, dependent upon the crafter's hand, the writer's pen, to pluck them, to bring the thread of insight through the loop of consciousness and incoorperate it into a pattern of understanding, maybe even a humble garment of wisdom to be worn eventually, with a pattern worthy of sharing that someone else might want to learn from and follow, someday.

I found the analogy fascinating, and had to get the beginnings of it out... as I'm sure there's more there that I'm not seeing yet, amateur writer and newbie knitter that I am, both. These ruminations remind me of one of my favorite quotes concerning writing,

There are a thousand thoughts lying within a man that he does not know till he takes up a pen to write.

~ William Makepeace Thackeray

And along those lines, certainly there must be a thousand pieces lying within a woman that she does not know till she takes up a needle to knit, or a brush to paint, or...

Truly, creativity is soul-food, satisfying in all its varying forms. I've always wanted to be an artist when I grow up. And maybe I am becoming one after all... as I learn what it truly means to be an artist... it is to observe with care, and then to create with intent. The longer I live, and the more I learn by doing, the more I'm realizing that art is living, and learning to see the spectacular in the commonplace, growing, nurturing, giving attentiveness to detail, and forming with purpose; be it a child's willfulness and imagination, a poem, a scarf, an orderly home, a healthy meal, or clay.

These creations are, or can should be, culminations of us, our efforts, careful offerings to the Lord as well as to those around us. The eternal power of creativity found residing within those hidden, quiet moments of communion with the Almighty , gifted to us in our likeness toward our Maker, savored and realized in humble stitches, intuitive strokes, home-made teas, gardens tended, love made, children's drawings displayed, and choice words in poetry read aloud... or encompassing silence of dreams untold.

Yes indeed, I like knitting, it's somehow like writing. Writing is like knitting... words framed and knit together in such a way that they may be seen, felt, and worn... thoughts that unless written, realized and shared, would have no warmth or life to offer, like that ball of yarn which is not yet a scarf that my boy can wear, but everything necessary to make one... if only I will give it my time, and concerted effort, one stitch at a time.

I don't know if my thoughts are lost in translation here, but I certainly feel accomplished to have risen with the morning and put them in print. Yes, I do believe that one could even go so far as to say that so much in life that's worth having, knowing and doing, is like knitting... yarn ravelled into garments, wisdom knitted from a life lived, words fitted together and mounted upon a page like gems... Counting of the days... like stitches in a tapestry woven, that we may gain a heart of wisdom, know His pattern for our lives...

So, should can I go back to sleep now, or should I knit? Or write more? hehe. Chris is getting up now, the coffee/teeccino is on... baby S is still sleeping. Looks like rain outside, with a little thunder. Mmmmmm-hm, a good day has begun. If only I didn't have to go grocery shopping, which means the dreaded walmart (uggh.). *sighs* Aaaah well, that's later, and I always like going to the salvage store too, to see what treasures I might find cheap there.

You see what happens here? I write a few posts, and then it's like I've turned on the tap or something, the thoughts keep flowing. Yes, there's much more, this is merely an aside to the swirling thoughts that whirled about in my sleepy brain last night and rudely awakened me this morning- mere asides, always seems to be the bloggable thoughts, the outer strings I guess, to follow my own analogy out. At least my journal pages are filling, even as I'm tiring of my own wordy self now. Funny how that works, the words seeming to come all at once, or not at all. At least now, when I can't write, I can knit...

*Update Today*

It is a perfectly rainy, thunderous day outside, which makes for a cozy, special time inside. T just finished making a new peanut butter/birdseed birdfeeder on a giant pinecone, we've sweet potatoes with EVO and sea salt baking in the oven, and a double batch of wholegrain wheat bread dough mixing (plenty for cinnamon rolls!). Grocery shopping has been cancelled for now. Chris got off work early, due to the rain, and has volunteered to get groceries, what a guy! Baby S is napping now, and I thought that I would be too, but I'm having too much fun knitting with T, between sipping hot tea and reading snippets of The Laurel's Kitchen Bread Book, while N strums chords on his guitar.

Technorati Tags: knitting, writing, art

A sweet new friend of mine, Julie, of Seeking the Old Paths, has recently awarded my blog and I with this most excellent award! Thank you Julie, you've made me smile! What timely encouragement it has been and now I shall do the same for some of my favorite blogging pals...

By accepting this Excellent Blog Award, you have to award it to 10 more people who’s blog’s you find Excellent Award worthy. You can give it to as many people as you want but please award at least 10. Thank you out there for having such great blogs and being such great friends! You deserve this! Feel free to award people who have already been awarded…

I hereby bestow the Excellent Blog Award upon the following excellent bloggers... thank you all for the various ways you've encouraged me over the years. I do hope to find more time to visit you all and read your blogs more regularly in the future (note to self: figure out how to use the rss feeds, it would help). So, without further ado, and in no particular order:

1. Leslie, aka. Tim's Mom, of Bona Vita Rusticanda, who really doesn't live very far away from me at all and I still do hope to get together with sometime IRL (since it's been like a year since we said we were going to... I'm thinking it may have something to do with the fact that we're so much alike- procrastinatin', no-phone-talkin' homebodies*lol* ...and life is so busy).
2. Jenny of Under His Wings, my email and snail mail friend, who always challenges and inspires me (and even knitted my baby girl a blanket!). I love to ponder the things of our Lord with you dear sister.
3. Birdie of Wings and Prayers, who I met during our mutual times of loss and continued celebration of new life. I'm so glad that we found each other when we did friend, what a blessing it has been to walk beside you.
4. Athena in a Minivan who is so down to earth and always makes me laugh.
5. Firefly, of Bioluminescence, whom I'm so glad to see glowing again... and who also supports Ron Paul, oh yeah!
6. Barb, who always inspires me with her Book of Days and red-headed boy that could be N's twin.
7. Susie, my IRL (in real life) neighbor and friend, who lives By the Creek and thinks I'm sassy.
8. Carla of More Books and Things, my witty-kindred-spirit Canadian sister who is a much better pen pal than I, and whose blog I must admit, I don't keep up with very well (prolific researcher and blogger that she is). I know her to be most excellent via email, snail mail, and her now private, beautiful family/picture blog (which I do keep up with, and it's excellent too). It always amazes me how uncannily she knows just what I need to hear, right when I need to hear it. Her timely words have brought me healing tears, and her dry sense of humor has caused me to burst out laughing out loud numerous times, bringing childrens' exasperated inquiries to know "what's so funny Mom?!". And our daughters have now become more faithful penpals than we are. I can never keep up with all of her deep musings at her MB&T blog, makes my head spin, but it's excellent anyways...
9. Carla Lynne of Joys in the Journey, who's been a delightful encourager and inspiration in my blogging journey ever since I met her in our homeschoolblogger days, which would be before our homesteadblogger days. It seems I'm always learning something new when I visit your blog.
10. Dana, of the very smart Principled Discovery, whose old blog is now her new blog, Simple Pleasures (so glad you started this one!) and whose new blog is really her old blog... did ya get that? They are both excellent! I just love to stop by them both, one for sipping chai and catching up with my ol' blogging bud, the other for keeping up with great discussions over what's going on in the bigger picture concerning education and politics, etc. I'm always learning something when I stop by there to pick her brain. I met and became friends with Dana during our homeschoolblogger days, before she was such a famous blogger/writer (and merely dreamed of being published, and quoting herself). Hah! I'm so happy to say she's her same genuine self. This is another friend that I wish I could keep up with better (reading-wise I mean, wouldn't even dream of writing as much... wondering how do you do it girlfriend? ...gifted I tell ya!)
11. Andrea, whose AtypicalLife often leaves me in stitches *lol* (that would be laughing out loud), and whose hubby and her have a knack for do-it-yourself-why-did-we-buy-this-house-home-project-house-renovations like we do, and whose hard work helps keep my blog around.
12. Randi of i have to say... who taught me how to make my first quilt, and whose lovely blog is always a feast for the eyes as well as the soul.
13. Brandy, whose Variety Garden Blog is always a joy to peruse, and whose family garden is expecting another sprout soon! Congratulatons!!!
14. Tina of Our Life who is so down to earth and it seems I have so much in common with at times... when I make way over to her place, I'll usually find myself nodding knowingly. She has a knack for blogging about those interesting little everyday occurrences that I can totally relate to.

Wish I had more time in my days to keep up with these talented ladies, and all of the others who I simply cannot even fit on this list... for even now I'm thinking of more excellent blogs I know and visit, but alas... I must call it quits for now. I've already been here too long. Need to get hoppin' 'round here.

Remember these two miracle babies?

Well, here they are about a month (or two?!) ago now... cute as can be!

Babies S & V

Isn't our heavenly Father just amazing? I squeeze this girl and thank Him for her, N and T every day. I can hardly believe that baby V has a tooth already and is already tasting new foods! Baby S has quite a few new tricks lately too... let's see, where to start? She seems to be changing so much every day!

She loves to grab her feet and try to stick them in her mouth, along with everything else. She's gotten very good at picking things up and then retrieving them once she's dropped them. She reaches out to touch everything now. She is noticeably interested in her board books, grabs the pages and turns them (well it seems like she's turning them anyways! and stares intently at the pages. One of her favorite places (besides co-sleeping in our big bed or riding around on my hip) is her bouncer, where she jumps around like a little wild thing. She just smiles and laughs a lot too, we're all totally smitten with her.

I think we need to get little S and V together with L for another photo op soon! Cindy, Susie? ...we could let the bigguns run wild for a couple hours while we have some coffee, gab and watch the babies roll and scoot around on the floor. I'm sure that we could even think up some educational categorization for the time well spent.

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Now playing: John Mayer - Waiting on the World to Change
via FoxyTunes

It's truly a mysteriously lovely thing when the Lord orchestrates meetings, relationships and life-long friendships in one's life. We've been so blessed over the years by the various people whose paths have crossed with ours.

And I'm forever thankful and honored to be counted as a friend to my dear sister in the Lord, Barbara Ann... and her dear husband, Russ, who is like a brother to Chris and I both. We met them over 9 years ago, eating at McD's after church one night, when our son was only 6 mos. old. Barbara and I got to talking, found we shared many interests, such as our love for the arts (she's a high school art teacher, and talented artist as well), as well as our love for the Lord. We exchanged numbers, and within the week she'd called to invite our family over to their house for dinner.

We've been the closest of friends ever since. We've become family even, and through their friendship have learned more of the close bonds that can be (should be) shared within the family of God. I've watched and prayed as her little girls have grown into lovely young ladies and close friends as well. She's done the same as our babies have grown into a little girl and boy. And a funny co-wink-E-dink (actually one of many), her birthday is the week of mine, AND Russ's birthday is the week of Chris's, so we've shared in many family celebrations.

I'll never forget so many years ago when we both decided to go to a ladies' Christmas gift exchange party at our church (I was a young newlywed, this was my first ever "home church") and every lady was supposed to bring a favorite coffee/tea cup to exchange. Whomever's cup you received you were supposed to consider that one your "prayer sister" and pray together throughout the year.... I remember not wanting to go (it just felt so contrived, and besides, I could hardly seem to pray enough for those whom I already knew that the Lord had placed in my life to pray for, like Barbara for instance). But Barbara insisted that if she was going, I was going too. So, she came and picked me up. We pulled our cups out of their wrappings to show each other, and admired each other's cups in her van, exchanging wishes that we'd get each other's numbers, and laughing as we joked that we could have (I'm such a homebody, and was thinking *should have*) just exchanged mugs on our own. So, we got to the party, chatted and had fun, and then LO & BEHOLD! we drew each other's #'s from a box of over 30 other attending ladies' #'s!! How cool was that?! That mug of hers is still my fave. She and I both were so tickled, and now it was *official*, God had sealed it, made us prayer sisters for life, and to this day we are just that.

We've shared in so many wonderful memories over the years, seen each other tested and shared in our tears and triumphs. We've shopped together, cooked together, watched many movies together, played cards into the wee hours of the morning together, painted together, packed box after box together (don't *what* I would've done without her that move!!) and cleaned house together, folded each others' laundry (you know you're close when it's no big deal to fold the underwear of each others' families), vegged on her porch with our mags. and tea, or on her deck, watching the kids swim, tanning, chatting and being silly, etc. I've gotten many of our family's fave recipes from Barbara, who grew up on a farm. Barbara taught me how to use the sewing machine I inherited from my MIL, and helped me make my first curtains, bumper pads and little blanket for my first darling girl.

It was Russ who turned us on to Phil Keaggy, juicing with champion juicers, and his obsession with Civil War history has sparked a keen interest in us as well... We've studied the Bible together, and celebrated the Biblical feasts together for our first times. He's been an inspiration to our children, and to us in so many more ways than I could ever say... Our kids have always known them as Uncle Russ and Aunt Barbara...and they love our children, as their own. They've enriched us, and made our lives better. During the past three years in which we've lived far away from them, they've made such sincere efforts to stay close, visiting and sending cards, letters and care packages. Since we've moved here to TN (just over a year ago now) they've visited us twice! Well, I certainly didn't plan for this post to be quite so long, just got to reminiscing I guess. But thanks to these dear friends of ours, I experienced many years ago, for the first time, the feeling of belonging in, and just being in, the *family* of God. I've learned that truly, Spirit is thick thicker than blood.

Anyways, NOW to my original point and reason for this post!!

Russ and Barbara just got back from their first trip to Israel! And yesterday we were all so surprised to find that we'd received a package from them! How excited I was! Why it never even occurred to me that DUH!, our best friends have gone to Israel, and so surely we will get something! What kind of friend would go to Israel, and NOT think to bring us something back, I don't know? *sheesh* But they sure did! Inside the box were such treasures... I was surprised at how overcome I was with emotions as I unwrapped each precious gift. Even the wrapping paper was so interesting, newspaper with Arabic writing all over it (we were all fascinated, N especially liked seeing the advertisements), bags from gift shops in Jerusalem, Hebrew pamphlets. The gifts are so lovely, but it was the love they were packaged in which I felt so tremendously, which had so blessed me on this and yesterday.

The card that sent me to tears (just to see her handwriting even, yes, I think I'm missing my friend...) read;

I believe we are HERE for a reason.
As each DAY unfolds,
we see less of the SHADOW
and MORE of the SON...

Dear Ones,
We wish you a happy Rosh Hashanah! Jesus is the head of our year and we celebrate his birth.
God bless you. Love, Russ, Barbara, Natalee & Sheena

They sent us each a t-shirt.
Mine was white with a lovely pic. of a dove with an olive branch flying out of the Christian fish symbol, which is overlaid by a gold star of David with a menorrah at the center of it. It says, "Then Yeshuah said to them, "Follow Me, and I will make you become fishers of men." Mark 1:17 in English, around the silk-screened pic., and then says it again in Hebrew below the pic., LOVELY!

Chris's is black with the classic messianic seal on it in gold, and it says "Branches were broken off that I might be grafted in." Romans 11:17

Nathan went bonkers over his IDF (Israel Defence Forces) t-shirt, which is the Tzahal - Israel Army T-Shirt.

Tabitha's is a lovely red t-shirt with a pic. of a camel, and it says ISRAEL in bold letters. They sent her a camel stuffed animal along with it which she's been carrying around everywhere, and slept with last night.

AND they sent us a Mezuzah with Shin carved into it (Letter signifying the Name of God, Means "tooth" and is the symbol of Divine Peace, Power and Mastery, but also of Corruption and Falsehood. One of the holiest letters in the Hebrew language, it appears on its own on the mezuzah attached to the doorpost of all Jewish households as the sign of El Shaddai, the Holy Spirit.), atop the Messianic seal, carved from olive wood, in Jerusalem (and inscribed as such)! I've wanted one of these for years (Jenny did I not just mention that to you?!). This Mezuzah is also a symbol of the identity of believers in the Messiah Yeshua. We will put a traditional scroll of Shema in it before we put it up on our doorpost. Now I'm so glad that I waited, and now have one that's so much more special to me than if I'd just mail-ordered for one (which I can't even *afford* anyways right now). Thanks God for a mezuzah and friends who are truly inspired in their gift-giving!

Also, a beautiful rock from the land of Israel. Once again, my own emotions caught me off guard. As I unwrapped it such thoughts and realizations washed over me, thoughts of what I was holding in my hand overcame me ~ a piece of THE LAND, from the place holy place where history began, and where the greatest prophecies of all time will be fulfilled, the very epicenter of this earth's Creation! *sighs* Barb told me that Russ kept weeping the whole time they were there, so overcome was he with it all. I can only imagine how profound it must be to actually visit that historically and spiritually rich land, walking on its ground, breathing the air that Jesus and his followers of many ages have breathed... imagining their voices still being echoed in the wind... Wow!

They also sent me my birthday present, a fancy "Natural Beauty" by Etre' lotion and nail care set, with a special card from Barbara. The lotion is of a lovely citrus scent, and "formulated with Dead Sea Minerals". It comes with this fancy charcoal buffer and some cuticle oil made of all natural ingredients in almond and grape oils. They also sent me a lovely chandelier style silver/turquoise (my fave) necklace, bracelet and earring set made in Jerusalem, WOW! *sighs* This is so very nice, the kind of thing I will so enjoy, and certainly can't afford to buy myself right now!

Thank you Lord for your gift of comradery in special friends that you've hand-picked for us and destined for us to mix lives with...

On this day I thank you for the blessed soul ties and heart strings we have with our friends and family, old and new... May we ever encourage one another.

~ Barbara Ann & Beth Ann, December 2004 ~ Kindred Spirit Sisters ~

Tabitha with her new shirt from Israel...

Nathan with his new shirt from Israel...

For more info. on the mezuzah, click here; Signs & Symbols